Tuesday 24 October 2017

Stupid name changes for companies (and what they mean)


When companies get bored, they feel the need to change something. Anything. As "a change is as good as a rest", quite often the company gets a face-lift with a new name, although occasionally it's inflicted on them via a take-over. However, quite often the name hasn't quite gone through the think-tank.


Here are a few stupid name changes for companies you may have heard of:

Santander - (previously Abbey National, Alliance & Leicester, Bradford & Bingley). 
Named after a northern Spanish port best known - in fact ONLY known - for two things: two catastrophic disasters. Firstly, a ship blew up the harbour in 1893 (killing everyone); and secondly, a house-fire led to the town being burnt to the ground in 1941. So next time time you have the Santander name thrust down your throat ("The new name for Abbey!" they banged on about), just remember it's synonymous with disaster on a biblical scale. Grief!

HSBC - (previously The Midland Bank etc). 
Despite the bank's protestations to the contrary, HSBC actually stands for The Hong Kong And Shanghai Banking Corporation. Founded in Hong Kong by a Scotsman in the 19th century, the bank was set up to aid the local traders, renowned for trading in opium. Yes, a bank founded on hard drugs. Makes you proud.


Aviva - (previously Norwich Union, Commercial Union, General Accident; largest insurance company in UK, even owns the RAC,...). 
Aviva is a Hebrew name for "spring" or "renewal", as in the name of the Israeli city Tel Aviv. Originally founded in 1797 in Norwich, the Norwich Union had its own fire brigade, but only for their own customers; everyone else could burn. Nice.

AkzoNobel - (previously ICI). 
The one-time jewel of British industry ICI was bought by Amsterdam's AkzoNobel, a Dutch multinational. Yes, the world's greatest chemical company now has its HQ in the drug capital of Europe. The Nobel side of the company derives from weapons of mass destruction; for example, Alfred Nobel was the man behind the explosive nitroglycerin. Poetic.


Consignia - (briefly the name of The Royal Mail) 
The name change was described by the BBC as:  "A duffer. A howling waste of money. The most ruinous decision since the biblical scam that saw Esau swap his birthright for a bowl of stew." It is thought that the name was dumped when it was observed that Consignia apparently meant "lost-luggage" in Spanish.